YouTube - Real Life Simpsons Intro

"Someone went through a lot of trouble to very accurately depict the Simpsons intro with real life actors. " - Comment on YouTube

A LOT of trouble.

Wow.

write it like disaster: how to win trials and influence people

You may have been following the Moussaui case in the news, and noticed the thing about the government lawyer getting kicked off the case for going against the judges orders and giving the witnesses printed talking points. This guy got a copy of the talking points... let's peek in, shall we?

TIP SHEET FOR PROSECUTION WITNESSES
(PLEASE KEEP CONFIDENTIAL)

Use specifics whenever possible. Details help paint a story and create (or, we should hope, uphold) the image of truth. For instance, which of the two sounds more convincing to you? 1) "I seem to recall that he may have been up to something with those guys." 2) "I remember him saying, 'I plan to hijack an airplane and fly it into a building along with my co-conspirators.'" If you said the second, you're right -- note that it is filled with details, such as an actual quote, or the helpful phrase "co-conspirators" which is more specific than "those guys."

mightybear: Food for Thought

Fun little vignette about SeanJr:

If an adult ate the same meal Connor typically does (but scaled up), they'd have: 8 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, 4 bananas, 4 nutrigrain fruit bars and sometimes 4 adult sized cups of yogurt with fruit for dessert.

And he's not really that big - just really big for 2.25 years old.

Drinking While Intoxicated By William?Saletan

Wha whaaaa?

Texas is busting people for "public intoxication" in bars. Undercover agents have "infiltrated" 36 bars and arrested 30 drinkers. Explanations from the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission:

1) We're doing it to stop drinkers before they get in a car.

2) Even if they're not going to get in a car, maybe they'll "walk out into traffic and get run over."

3) Or maybe they'll "jump off of balconies trying to reach a swimming pool and miss."

4) Anyway, bars aren't exempt from laws against public intoxication.

Thanks to slate for the link.

Kids Say The Darndest Things, Episode I

So, over at EverBabe's house tonight. SeanJr is being TERRIBLY cute, with his premiere two-year-old vocabulary. I suggest you check out his blog, to read his Mom's story of his word recognition (good for 27 months, really)

But towards the end of the evening, as he was giving his good night kisses (Daddy was in the other room):

1-> He kissed mommy (on the cheek)
2-> He kissed me on the cheek
3-> He looked away, and sloooowly said "hyoooomoooooooooe"

We're both pretty sure it was just an accidential confluence of consonants and vowels, but seriously; sometimes it's harder than it should be not to laugh when you are around toddler homophobia.

PartiallyClips - Motorcyclists

Two Words:

Ouch.

Curleygirl Days: Viva Las Vegas!

EverBabe -

You might like this blog, as it contains two things important to you: traveling with toddlers, and Vegas, baby, Vegas!

Couple of amusing mispelings.

1-> Resume crossed my desk today. It said:

Adittionally, my technical writing skills are a major asset...

(oh no she di'int....)

2-> From an Ebay listing for a device that usually runs in the multiple thousands of dollars.

Su Good Eats ? Chinese New Year Bash: Roast Pork Buns

Scroll about halfway down, look at the roasted pork, and realize that I will be making this recipe very soon.


EverBabe - you are invited, of course. Anyone else, please RSVP. ;-)

Cooking 101: Add 1 Cup of Simplicity

Cute story about cooking lack of know-how. I believe in substitution & not being a slave to recipes, but seriously:

"described the kind of e-mails and calls (General Mills) gets asking for cooking advice: the person who didn't have any eggs for baking and asked if a peach would do instead, for example; and the man who railed about the fire that resulted when he thought he was following instructions to grease the bottom of the pan -- the outside of the pan."

Draw a pig personality test

Thanks, SuperMark...

{psigh} I was being so good, today, too...)

Video - Can't drive 55?

From KayRay:

"I just missed it on world news in wed night, but thanks to google video:"

part of the AJC article:

Drive 55, try to stay alive Students tempt the fates, get it on film, and
make big news

By ARIEL HART

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Published on: 03/03/06
They knew it was dangerous.
"We could have really been hurt," said one of the Atlanta college students after their
experiment. "I was pretty sure that I was doing something stupid," said
another. That may be true. But, young and brash, they had a plan.
They wanted to go the speed limit on I-285.
In four cars, on all four lanes, the students from Georgia State University and other local colleges paced the entire midmorning flow of Perimeter traffic behind them at 55 mph for half an hour. They call it "an act of civil obedience."
"I get a lot of tickets," said Andy Medlin, 20, the Georgia State student who came up with the idea. "The best way to expose the flaws in the system is by following it."
Thankfully, they survived unharmed, though much maligned. The eight students captured it all on video for a student film competition, and the five-minute piece has fired up the country this week on blogs, talk radio, and national news broadcasts.
"NPR was the first biter," said Jordan Streiff, 21, the group's experienced filmmaker
and an Asian Studies major at Georgia State. "Initially, we were going to be on
ABC's cable network and Web site, but overnight the traffic to the video spiked
so they put it on World News Tonight."

Sort of a real life "Waterboy"

follow this link

You ever have that feeling...

.. you know, that one where you just said something, and were literally trying to reel it back into your mouth as you were saying it, all the while thinking "omigodyouaren'treallysayingthatareyou?wtf!shutupshutupshutup" Like the time you realize that you shouldn't *really* have talked bad about one of your bosses' mother. Or, like, you accidentally reply-to-all for a global email, and everyone then knows how you really feel about whatever the subject matter was.

Or, like, you are filling out an automatic report online, and get an confirmation email that includes the name of the legal counsel for your company, and, in sending a worried email to your co-worker about how uncomfortable you are making yourself known to the upper level management of your company, you accidentally CC: the wrong person.

You CC: the CEO. Of your 1,300 person company.

The text of your (or, let's be honest here, *my*) message? "Well, at least the CEO wasn't included." Oh, bitter, bitter irony....

In other news: happy 300th post, Sean.

New Seannibal Feature (?)

What the hey: I like Chinese. For now, (when I remember,) I'll let you guys know my most recent fortunes.
Last Saturday, I went to dinner with Ogre and his wife, and got one. It said: 'Pure love is a willingness to give withough a thought of receiving anything in return." You know what I read? "Blah blah pure love blah blah." Boo-ring.

Thursday week, it said, simply: "You will be successful at everything."

Wow. Not even everything that I try- apparently I'll succeed at the things I don't try too. I may be succeeding RIGHT NOW, and not even realize it. How awesome is THAT?

Locus Online: Robin Hobb interview excerpts

The above link is for Everbabe, Nicole, and anyone else who has read and enjoyed Robin Hobb.

(I don't know why I was surprised to find it was a pseudonym... all the good authors do it, and it really just gives me a chance to read some earlier stuff. Still - interesting snippets from the interview.)

Uncle Sean II

Photo of me and SeanJr Jr when he was a wee 4 hours old.

Nice looking baby, if I do say so myself.

(and I know that his parents agree)

In the spirit of full disclosure -

If memory serves, we've talked in the past about my affinity for holidays. A lot of the what seemed at the time to be major life love-ish events have been holiday-driven (or at least holiday-adjacent.) So: I plan on going to trivia tomorrow night, and hopefully will run into PYT there, for some more flirting. I mean trivia. More trivia. So: tomorrow night is Valentine's Day.

That's all I'm saying.

In other news: on Christmas, I got an "Merry Christmas" IM on my phone from a number I didn't recognize. Being the carefree dude I am, I responded with well wishes of my own, and decided that I would return the favor on New Year's. Which I did. And then on MLK. I'm going to IM this mysterious stranger on major (and minor) holidays from now on, I think. Male? Female? I don't know. For now, I call this person (i'm *pretty* sure it's a person) 'HolidayIM'. So, HolidayIM, if you're out there - Happy Valentine's Day!

In other *other* news: I know that pictures of other people's kids can get a little old - however, there is a video of SeanJr that I recommend, and he's not even my kid. He's dancing along with his animatronic friend. Tres cute.

AOL Music: Full CD Listening Party -- hear the latest albums, track by track, before you buy them

Complete. Free. Streaming. CD's.

Great for those with broadband connections.

Random Thoughts, Post Trivia Edition

--> Got back from seeing SeanJr Jr. He's the cutest little squished face giant baby I've ever seen. At least that I've ever seen on day 0 of his outbound life. I think that all of us will once again believe in the giant babies we see on TV trying to pass as newborns now. Mom was in great shape (apparently, the epidural is the way to go - who knew?) and Dad was sweet enough to get me an "I'm an Uncle" pin that I'll be wearing all week. Although I definitely think of *myself* as Uncle Sean, it's nice that SuperMark thought of me that way (or at least got me the pin.) It probably doesn't hurt him to be magnaminous, though, as he has, once again, ended up with not only a clone of himself, but indeed, a clone of SeanJr. I'll have to be sure be the uncle that gets them the absolutely matching sweaters, as *someone* has to traumatize them.

--> When I moved into my house approximately one year ago, I needed the standard necessities. That, combined with my love affair with all things Costco, led to the following purchases (remember, these are all Costco sized):

2 large boxes of dishwashing detergent
1 large box of laundry detergent
12 giant rolls of paper towels
36 rolls of toilet paper
18 bars of soap
6 tubes of toothpaste

And finally a Dollar store bottle of shampoo

At the time, I offered odds as to which of these I would run out of first. KayRay mentioned that a friend of hers in a similar situation *thought* the TP would go first - but mercy's name if the soap didn't bite the dust. (it could have been a combo of the fact that said friend was a guy that lowered consumption of one and raised consumption of the other... but I digress.) As it happens, I haven't gone through one CU (Costco Unit) of anything *yet*, but this reminded me of something else. Since Halloween I've been shaving my head semi-regularly. This has forced me to buy my first can of shaving cream in over 15 years. Which leads me to the following, o so different question: "What substance mentioned above does it suck the WORST if it get's into your eyes?" Will answer in a later post - prize to those who guess right.

--> At trivia tonight at the Ale House, Team Derek left after the first quarter. I stuck around, and met a pretty young thing (massage therapist, apparently has Chakras.) I tried to tell her about the international sign for 'rub my back' (As Red knows, it involves shrugging your shoulders and looking plaintive; try it at work!). So, we may have someone else to keep you semi-informed about. Or not. Either way - we'll be back at Trivia next Tues.

SeanJr Jr is on the way

Long time readers of this blog will be happy to learn that the arrival of EverBabe's kid two (or, as I like to call him, SeanJr Jr) is imminent. Congrats to EverBabe and SuperMark!

(will give you more info when it arrives)

LATER THAT DAY:
Big Baby SeanJr Jr born at 2:10 PM - at 9 lbs 4 oz. And, interestingly, they went ahead with the chaSE ANderson name. I mean, seriously - now i will owe them *my* firstborn's name Ajo Dyson K., or Jamar Kelly K, etc, etc.

YouTube - Brokeback to the Future

Last one tonight - promise.

As Ryan from Dinosaur Comics said, "I am a big fan of this short, which recuts the BTTF trilogy into a M/M romance. Gold!"

Soup Special

People that know me know that I love me some good bad mistranslations. I've known about this site for a while, containing photos of mistranslated signs, really no different than you might get out of BabelFish. Examples include "Engine room is serious place" or an offbrand Superman(TM) shirt that they forgot to add the "U" to. In revisiting the site today, however, I found one that really made me laugh.

Katie Holmes is the queen of fashion

EverBabe - I'm glad that you aren't getting dressed by the same people who dress Katie Holmes.

"Katie Holmes got some coffee yesterday sporting what can only be described as a fishnet leotard tucked into her crotch."

MADHOUSE Takes On City Hall

Funny (if a bit sophomoric) letters to municipal authorities in the frozen north. Reminescent of Ted Nancy, really. Here's a sample.

To: James Plitz (Plan Examiner)
Subject: Plans
From: Pat Wisking

I have a plan I would like examined, and being that I am a resident of Kanata, and you are a plan examiner for the city of Kanata, I thought you the logical contact.

Anyways, here's the plan:

First, I would need to get my hands on maybe a ladder, or a large trampoline. The trampoline might be a little unwieldy, but heck... it's a trampoline, man!

Good stuff.

Tripod perform at a Comedy Festival - Google Video

Thanks to Mark H. for hooking me up with a music video for what I would like to call the "Modern Wives Lament."

(I think that we've all been there - in the mood, late at night, snuggling up to that special someone...)

Memoirs (wha?) Memoirs of a Geisha

Alrighty, many of you hypothetical readers have asked for an update to my dating situation. "Hey," you may be saying, "what ever happened to those three. fatal. errors? How'd that work out for you?" Well, imaginary friend, I'm happy to let you know that I was able to parlay that mistake-ridden evening into another date, and, post-holidays, a third. As I received a fair amount of guff from the peanut gallery (you know who I am talking to here!) about choosing Ikea for our first night out, I decided date 3 should be more traditional: dinner & the above mentioned movie.
I decided that this time, I'd put my best foot forward. I got the car washed in the garage at the office. I figured hey, we work in the same building as the North American headquarters for Porshe, maybe some overpriced luxury sportcar mojo would rub off. Turns out that maybe I shouldn't have gotten the carpets shampooed, for instead what seems to have rubbed off is wet dog smell. Was this an omen? If so, I ignored it.
Ah well, at least the OUTSIDE of the car looks good. (Amazingly good, to tell the truth - I didn't know the old girl had it in her.) Well - *looked* good. It's hard to say exactly what changed to make me less impressed with the shine. Maybe it was the suicidal dove(!) who flew into my windshield on the way to dinner. Hmm - I'm beginning to see a pattern.
Dinner went well, and we headed to the movie. Good thing that happened there: we got free passes! Bad thing: The reason WHY we got the free passes was because the movie actually melted, right in a good part. {side note - i think that is the first time i have actually ever seen that before in real life. I've seen it on TV and in movies (if memory serves, Rocky Horror) Any of you ever have a movie melting experience?)
On the other omeny hand - she has pet rabbits, and I did see the wild rabbit that lives outside when I got home. Another omen? or just coincidence? Only time will tell.

Runoff storage, back home

This is a rare work related article. Ogre - note the proposed Publix near Paige's Thieves Market.

Chinese Search Engines

EverBabe has been reading Scott Adams blog
recently, and turned me on to it. In style, it's similar to Dave Barry in that it makes you think while you smile, but better in that it is free, updated daily, and wanders a bit more. Where good Barry columns are like good Seinfeld episodes, with 4-5 different topics weaving together for one big exciting conclusion, Scott's tend to focus on one issue, with a few really 'gotcha' moments.

In today's, he talked about the news that Google will be blocking some search terms from Chinese web surfers (you know, like 'democracy' and 'booty call') One sentence caught my eye:

The Chinese citizens are missing a lot of good stuff. Most of my favorite web sites would blind a Chinese potato farmer. I just Googled the word “sex” and got 243,000,000 results.

I thought that he was being facetious, but when I searched from work (where I am, because I am retarded), when *I* Googled the word "sex", I only got 202,000,000. Which although PHENOMONAL, (I mean, seriously - 30+ pages for every man, woman and child?) is 40 BILLION less than his. Why are my search results different from his? It's the same Google, right?
If you don't mind, search and post your results. Maybe it's location specific?

For the gamer in your life

XBOX 360 Tracker - Find Xbox 360 In Stock Online

This is really here just to make it easier for me to grab a ecks box three sitty - but you are also welcome to check, as well.

Who Is Benjamin Stove?

Interesting little site. Probably an attempt at viral marketing for a game of some sort - but still - makes you think...

USATODAY.com - Man solves Rubik's Cube in 11.13 seconds

Sorry SuperMark - your 60 second solve looks so... plebian now.

For his victory, Makisumi won a Rubik's Snake puzzle, one of several variations on the basic cube model which has sold more than 100 million worldwide, according to the manufacturer.

I Thank You - New York Times

Thanks Slate for the following:

In the NYT's Book Review, author Henry Alford (maybe as an ode to awards season?) recognized gems that often exist in the "acknowledgments" section of books and combined unique ones to form some unexpected combinations.

Michael Knight - Pop Superstar

While you may have been aware of David's success amd superstardom overseas, it might be interesting to actually see it in action. It's a fun song, and I might just add it to my Kareoke list. Make sure you have some sound on, otherwise the music video(!) will lose a little.

This is some interesting synchronicity in DH timing. While I was in Florida for my cousin's New Year's Party (great party, by the way, Princess!) I got to catch up on some Broadway musicals. I've had the music for Jeckyl and Hyde for about a year, but it was hard to envision what was happening without having seen it before. Sadly, the version I got to see had Herr Hassellholf in the lead - bit of an overactor, believe it or not. Other than that, however, things went well.

Thanks to TheSuperficial for the pointer.

Time Cube

Thanks to Big_D for the above link. SuperMark, do you find the webpage design familiar?

(I'm not certain how D found it - but there is a Georgia Tech connection - play along at home and see if you can find it!)

FOUND Magazine | Poo Bear

Thanks to KayRay for the above link. As she points out: "It came from an operator at a wastewater treatment plant in LA... that's cool, non?" And then she twirled around in a little French dance.

Thanks to EverBabe for photo documentation of what exactly happens when boys are able to pick out their own clothes. (Note - any photoshopping I did was purely to add to comedic effect)
(modified to update picture)

The Ultimate Showdown

The Ultimate Showdown is a Flash video of, well... you can probably figure it out. Sound helps a lot.

In other news - Funny quote I just read: "had a scare at barnes and nobles when i saw "Supuku for dummies"...but it turned out to be sodoku" Heh. Thanks, NGnerd!

Hedonistica: Pleasure Yourself

I really am working today- but Conan O'Brien's year in review was pretty good.

(thanks to TheSuperficial for this link)

Naming Convention for Sean JrJr

EverBabe & SuperMark - it's just a suggestion, if Chase Anderson doesn't sit well...

The Superficial | Ricky Martin is so straight you'll turn gay

Everbabe - you know this one is for you...

Frappr! - Too Cute

...Warning Warning Warning...

These are some of the cutest baby animal pictures I think that I have seen - click at your own risk.

Now *this* is a good commerical...

The question is - why not show it?

My friend at Slate had the same question. If you find out - let them know.

SCARED OF SANTA GALLERY: Tis the season to be scared witless

If you like pictures of screaming babies on Santa's lap - (and really, who doesn't?) click here.

(In other news - i have a second date lined up. Yay! Chance to make all 8new* mistakes)

So: all in all, it's been an interesting week.

For today's blog, we'll talk about just a few of the lay-dee related incidents in my life, and then wrap up with the not one, not two, but three blunders from my first blind date. Skip ahead if you would like - I understand not everyone is interested in minutia from Sean's strange life. (Check that - If I really understood that, I probably wouldn't have a blog)

But moving on - It's been an interesting week, all things considered. Mom was in town, so she came over last weekend. It was great to have her there, and I even gave her a chore or two, which felt nice from a karmic standpoint. As we were flipping through my collection of DVD's, deciding what to watch, I discovered that she had never seen Say Anything. As that movie is sort of a seminal 80's movie, with some of the best scenes of teenage angst ever filmed, we decided to watch it. At about 15 minutes in, my cell phone rang. I checked the caller ID. Wha whaaaaa? TwoPairs was on the other line?!?

I don't think that I've related this story before. And I won't now. (thank blogger for eating my post!!!) Short form - One of (if not THE) first dates that I went on in high school was with a friend. For whatever reason, my family calls her TwoPairs now. Be that as it may, we hadn't spoken in 6 months to a year. (no bad blood - just missed connections.) A. also called, but Mom and I were watching a movie, dammit! Still - calls from first date, and ex-fiance - strange timing.

Then on Wednesday, I had my first blind date. I may have mentioned this whole thing about holidays being interesting to me for relationship based things. (I know I did - look it up, using Google's built in blog- searching capabilites.) {grin} But what I realized the day AFTER this date was that if I was willing to REALLY stretch on the definition of a holiday, it's still there. Because Wednesday was Pearl Harbor Day. Seriously. However, after my Veteran's Day of last year, I am seeing a disturbing militaristic trend; I'll aim for something less martial next time.

Back to the Three. Fatal. Errors. (TM)

1) Didn't pay for her meal.
Positive Spin: Um. Not really one.
Negative Spin: Cheap.
Reason I Didn't: Cafeteria type place. She jumped ahead of me. I'm new at this, and didn't want to appear paternalistic.
Remedy: Next time, let the goodies flow.

2) At end of date, didn't walk her to her car.
Positive Spin: Hey, we met online; he's not a stalker!
Negative Spin: Cheap *Jerk*, who doesn't care if I get mugged in the parking lot of Ikea.
Reason I didn't: Worried more about looking like a stalker.
Remedy: Next time, ask her if she minds if I walk her to her car, as my grandmother raised me that way.

3) At *end* of date - Sean-initiated handshake. Wha Whaa??
Positive Spin: Umm.. she saw my unnaturally flat fingernails?
Negative Spin: Oh. My. God. {shakes head}
Reason I didn't: I'm new at this? I am socially stunted? Against all previous evidence, I am shy? . . . I'm doomed.
Remedy: I've been advised of the existence of the 'half-hug-side-kiss,' of which I was previously unaware. That will prove helpful in the future.

No one warned me of these common pitfalls. Positive Spin: But even if I messed up with this date, I'll hopefully get the chance to make all new mistakes next time.

As evidence of synchronicity, however, a monster attacked a villager on the shore of Loch Ness. Er. No - that was Sting. What happened to ME was that I got a call from my high school prom date THE DAY AFTER the Three.Fatal.Errors.(TM) And we reminesced.
But that's another entry.

Warning to All!

(but especially SuperMark)

Sean's Big Date - Take 1

OK - I have 4.5 hours until my date tonight. (yes, with the internet girl from the beginning of November) Any suggestions on what to do, and what *not* to do? (For whatever reason, I choose IKEA as a first date (what...they have swedish meatballs and cinnamon rolls...)

Anybody's advice is appreciated - OnlyAymie already chimed in with some, saying "avoid butt pinching, unless asked. it can be a bit offputting early in a relationship"

And I *appreciated* that advice. I still might not listen to it, but definitely appreciate it.

I'll catch you up on the flip side.

Raquel's Blog -

It is probably just me - but I am pretty sure that the next time that I get middle school pictures of myself, I won't include my doll. Who is dressed the same.

Thanks to sitemeter for the link.

What's with the ladies at the back of the plane?!

Seriously - hire a driver. (well... you have to now, i guess.)

Petition Spot - Save Arrested Development (#3)

*IF* you enjoy watching the best written show on TV -
And *IF* you can't believe that Fox is going to cancel it -

You could try signing the above online petition.Hell - it *might* work.

The "Left Behind" Movies - How to end the world on a budget.

This movie review reminds me of comments made by my old roommate, who was a librarian, before the turn of the Century. (Only a few years ago, mind you, lest you think that I roomed with a nonagenarian. I did, but didn't want you to think that.)

He talked about how patrons would love the "Left Behind" series, which at that time was in it's 5th book. At least one older lady asked him if he thought that the AUTHORS believed in their own writing, which stated that the rapture was to begin around the Millenium.

My roommate paused, before replying "I don't know if they believe it or not; but I *did* just read that they signed a six year, 12 book contract." Heh

Your Health This Month - Death by kissing, dust-mite frustration, and a breast-feeding benefit for mothers. By Sydney?Spiesel

EverBabe - the third story is the one I wanted you to see, although the one about dust mites is pretty cool too.

Wonkette - backwards engineering foreign policy

OK, OK - I *am* more liberal than conservative. But you have to admit, this visual montage is pretty funny, whatever your politics.

I'm stealing from Mickey Kaus at Slate for this link. Hope to return the favor sometime.

Photo of Fitty Cent performing at a Bat Mitzpah

Yes, this urban man clearly in touch with the streets he came from, was not averse to performing a shout out at a 13-year-old's birthday party. Thank you, camera cell phones for this photo of Fitty, performing away.

I can't help but agree with the writers of TheSuperficial, who say

"It doesn't matter how many times you've been shot and how many gangster rap albums you've sold, because the second you perform at a little girl's bat mitzvah you're automatically a lame little sissy girl. 50 Cent could've strangled a bear with his bare hands, but from now on he'll forever be remembered as that pansy who performed at some rich girl's bat mitzvah."

Interestingly, he wasn't alone, though; the crew from Aerosmith and Don Henley were there too. I guess $500K will buy a lot of respect at the old folks home.

Roswell man beaten in home invasion | ajc.com

sooooo....

APPARENTLY one of my neighbors got beat up. Or beat down. Or beat sideways.

How very comforting. Wait - didn't I once write about something like that?

Hey - that's right! I completely forgot about *this* prediction. Wow... I guess my predictive powers are pretty good, but only if the guy who got jacked is really Osama Bin Laden. Or Janet Jackson's breast.

For Nicole (EverBabe's oldest friend)

Nicole - here are the *lyrics* to the song we were talking about. (fun 80's pop piece)

The Other Ones "Holiday"

happy T-day!

The Working Man's Roth

EverBabe-

Check out this article about the Roth 401K (different!!!)

PartiallyClips for Nicole - (cause of what you do for a livin.)

Nicole (if that's your real name:) Don't hesitate to rewrite your SciFi.

In other news...

Just wanted to let you all know, (yes, even *you*, Gisele Bundchen...) that I have offically jumped headfirst back into the dating pool. Or something.

I guess it shouldn't be *too* weird for me, seeing as how it's only been *10 years* since I went on a first date. Ok... a little weird. {grin}

"But Sean," some of the more observant of you say, "what about those *other* dates that you had the past few months? They certainly seem at least a *little* more recent that 10 years ago."

"Ah," I respond to the budding Seanologist. "Those don't count. A) I knew the ladies ahead of time, and B) the subject of the most successful of them moved to another state to live with another man less than two weeks after our second 'date.' That's right - I drove her not only to another man, but indeed another Senate District."

I sent a response to something I read on Craigslist, under the woman-seeking-man portion. I would post which one I responded to, but I am afraid that Leo DiCaprio (a regular lurker on this blog) woud try to steal her from me. I'll let you know how it works out.

Two notes for EverBabe -

1) Looks like we didn't win Mega Millions... so no Hurley problems for us. Phew.

2) This is a Best of Craigslist that made me laugh out loud- possibly because it made me think of you. I don't like taking a dump at someone else's house.

My grandmother's b-day.

A very fine lady, who has just turned 88 today. That's reasonably old. Just wanted to point this out.

My favorite quote from our conversation tonight: (and she was having second thoughts about saying it even as it was coming out of her mouth;)
"Sean, I have always felt that, of all of our many grandchildren, you have clearly most improved from when you were younger."

WooHoo! I'm just sorry that I am not still getting report cards - that would fit in perfectly. (altho it *is* year-end review time here at my company....)

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Photo Gallery (Finnegan the Squirrel)

Warning - disgustingly cute pictures of puppies and squirrels on the other side of the jump.

Updated photo of Sean - post halloween.

Many people (OK, two) have asked to get a picture of what I look like now sans hair. Well, here you go.

wedding bathroom supplies - Yahoo! Search Results

This is a re-visit episode of my blog, where we talk about the funny websearches that people have performed that led them to my blog. Previous iterations are located here and here.

Yahoo.com Number 2 for married womandate.com

Yahoo.com Number 36 for Pictures of pennys,nickels and dimes

Dogpile: Number 12 for what does g.i.l.f. mean?

And thanks again to KayRay for the original forward:
Yahoo.com: Top of the list for "wedding bathroom supplies

Wanna See My Boobees?

Don't worry - SFW

Two Funny Things (only one hairstyle related)

Alrighty: in checking my email this AM and weeding through the spam, I was intrigued by one of the subject lines: "We can change your relationship. chloroform." I felt like responding, saying "while it is true that my relationship may need some help, I don't feel like I am at the chloroform stage yet. But try me again in a few weeks."

The other thing is about my new low maintenance haircut: Went in to the Turkish mob dry-cleaners downstairs in my building with a load of shirts. He said: "Oh. You work at Porsche?"

Not yet, but it's nice that I could with my new, shiny head.

Lone Star Statements; or Amazon rankings of Time's 100 Best Novels

Thanks to Ryan North of Dinosaur Comics for tonight's link which reminds us that, no matter how good a book is, someone at Amazon will rank it one star.

FOXNews.com - Foxlife - Out There - Stickup Turns Stink-Up

Amusing vignette about a poor schmoe who couldn't even hold up a guy in a parking lot:

"After holding up a man in a parking lot on Sunday, a robber was hit five times by two vehicles, first by what cops think was the stickup man's own getaway driver and four more times by another car apparently driven by a woman who knew the 33-year-old victim, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel."

Sean's 2005 Halloween

OK - Let's play a game; differentiation is *fun!* What's different in the two photos below?

Me at the beginning of KayRay's partay:



Me at the end of KayRay's partay:



There were at least two major differences: did you spot them? Comments welcome.

Harriet Miers's Blog...

I am just sad I didn't find Harriet Meirs' blog *before* she pulled the plug.

As with Vader's blog, you may want to read some of the comments!!!

Some of them are hiLARious

Coverville

Specifically because KayRay asked, but also because I can't believe you all haven't heard of this site.

This is a site providing you with free, legal MP3s of a podcast (internet broadcast) show 'covering' all musical things "cover."

For instance, Episode 137 that I am listening to right now is playing Dolly Parton covering "Stairway." Yes, *that* "Stairway."

Wow. Anyhoo - enjoy!

EverBabe sells a house (almost), or How much is TOO much Windex?

I likes me the story of the... unexpected tenent.

mathaeis: It's on...like hunting ducks!

If you were a child in the 80's - you'll appreciate this link. From a crazy person.

Thanks to KayRay for this Nintendo homage.

SuperMark & SeanJr: Separated at birth - by 35 years

so: nice father/son linkage.... with photos!

qwantz.com - dinosaur comics - August 29th 2005

SuperMark - Number one - this comic is you.

Number 2 - EverBabe is gonna make you clean up SeanJr's squished apples. Be warned.

SPOILER - Serenity in 2000 Words or Less - SPOILER

This will be both uninteresting and a huge SPOILER if you haven't seen Serenity yet.

If you have, you'll love it.

Promise.

It's all in the trailer -

OR: how to turn an american horror masterpiece into a coming-of-age story.

Let me know if you have troubles watching this video.

Funny one-liner about new Papal recruiting rules.

"If the pope is looking to find non-gay men who don't like to have sex with girls, then godspeed to him. But, if he's looking for suggestions, then I say he should start advertising heavily at comic book and D&D shops nation-wide. Most of these guys aren't gay, can't get girls, and are interested in fictional stories of good v. evil.

Frankly, that's the best Benedict is going to do."

VIDEO: Kanye West and Mike Meyers on SNL | The Superficial

EverBabe - This is for you -

Ther reunion tour.

The Joy of Tech! (or, a bunch of in-jokes for Firefly fans)

Giant Squid - Don't mess with them.

Two Slate Articles for Swoopy. Swoopy - if you are reading these: good. They are for you.

The other article is below. Or beside. Either way - still for Swoopy. Intelligent design isn't just your great-grandpa's creationism, they contend. Instead, it fills in the myriad "gaps" and "problems" in Darwin's theory of evolution with an unnamed, omnipotent "designer." (Hint: His name rhymes with "Todd.")

Note - not responsible for your keyboard if you read and are not Swoopy. Is all I am saying.

Oh no - I'm a democrat!

(i think it was the stupid environmental laws that got me - stupid environment!) I was voting with my pocketbook!

You are a Social Liberal (66% permissive) and an... Economic Liberal (33% permissive) You are best described as a: Democrat Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating

for rob

You are a Social Moderate (43% permissive) and an... Economic Moderate (50% permissive) You are best described as a: Centrist Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Bush & Blair - Endless Love

Amusing - but TRUE!

So, I had this party....

Well, I just had a party this Saturday. If you weren't invited - you are not alone. Due to (unprintable) stuff, lack of foresight, and just letting people fall though the cracks, I dropped a LOT of people who were supposed to come. Let me tell you about some of them: (again, these are the people, who, for the most part, did NOT get invitations.)

--> One of my DragonCon/D&D buddies who lives down the street asked me if I wanted to come over Saturday to learn a new game. I said no, I couldn't - "...but would you like to come to my party?" (AWK-ward.....)

--> After looking at my Evite list, I saw that some of the emails I were using had been bounced back as no longer in service. I was gonna get around to the whole updating email thing, buuuuuut.... Must be why I ended up with one girl there from college, but not her best friend. (also a good friend - sorry, H!.)

--> My ex-girlfriend, A. I fully intended on inviting her (we're still pretty close friends) and was wondering why she kept on hinting that "we should go to dinner next week to catch up." When I said "Well, you're coming to the party, right?" she mentioned that she hadn't been invited. Augh. In *my* mind, I think it was pretty clearly just a mistyping/oversite, as I invited some of her friends (Chris - you'll see more of him later) and her frickin' ROOMMATE. Clearly an oversight. In her mind - well, who knows. Mysteerious minds of women, and all. I still felt bad, but not as bad as i did about....

--> Big D's family, who I have been spending a bunch of time with since he got sick. I was pretty sure I had told them, and didn't want to burden them with too much to do. So then they called me the next morning, and invited me to a movie (Corpse Bride, pretty good, not as singable songs as Nightmare.) Robynn: "So, what did you do this weekend?" Me: "Had a... party?" Robynn: "Ooooh. Why?" Me, sinking lower in my chair: " My... birthday?" Robynn: "When's your birthday?!" Me, almost to the floor: "To...day? Didn't you get the Evites?" Robynn: "Noooooooo."
Me, as defensive as one is while sunk all the way into a chair: "Well... I sent one! Really!"
First thing I did upon getting back to the house; check my evite history. And I did send one - to Big D. Who has been in the hospital since the day I sent it out. Great job, Sean. Good followthrough.

IN OTHER NEWS:

OnlyAymie came, and had fun talking with various other people. She sent me a message earlier today that read "So, are you going to do a birthday fogo too?" (At the party... )"we and the chrises and their wives were talking about fogo outside and having not gone in a while."

Heh. The chris's.

Obituary - Thanks to KayRay for the link

I was really almost going to go to this fellow's memorial service... then I determined that there was a small chance it was for real. So I chickened out.

Apparently the picture caught KayRay's eye as she was flipping through the obits on Sunday. Understandable, once you see it. And if you are a little squeamish about finding humor in an obit... I'll have to tell you about the funniest dead animal I ever saw. Next time. If you ask for it. (and BirthdayTwin, you know I'm talking to you.)

Suggestion/Answer Book Sampler: Sex in the Stacks (at Duke)

Amusing Q/A by Duke's librarians about some of the... naughtier activites possible at collegiate libraries. I liked the tone of the answers. Interstingly, *safe* for work.

Thanks, Amazon! (Or - Funny Item!! Really!!)

I am almost petrified to determine what this product is used for.
(why would it come in 2.2 pound containers?)

-edited to make people want to click on the product link above.

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Hurricane Katrina (Carjackings)

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Hurricane Katrina (Carjackings): "E-mail details purported increase in carjackings and release of sex offenders after Hurricane Katrina. "

Noodle - Pass this along as necessary. Carjacker = Georgia resident. Released prisoners = Not really. Nigerian millionaire = not a good idea to make money.

Everyday Hero for Katrina

Thanks to V for this link, reminding us of people who do a great job.

Funny vignette - OR: it could happen to anybody.

So: Was looking at the E-vite to my par-tay this afternoon with a friend.

Friend: "I'm not even going to ask who half of these people are."

Me: "you should be able to guess at least ONE of those people; P-Dogg works in that office over there." /gesture at nearby office.

Friend: Brief pause, then "....Dennis?" (Pat's officemate)

Me (skeptical look) "Don't you mean Puh-Dennis? Or Puh-Theresa? (unless it's one of those silent 'p's that i have been hearing so much about. Or rather, *not* hearing so much about.) "

Friend: (bashfully) "Ah. P-Dogg is *Pat*."

Yes Virginia... P-Dogg is Pat.

Update to Sean's Weird Websearches!

Alrighty - A *bunch* of stuff has been happening recently - too much for me to really want to deal with all at one time. But instead of dealing with the past week in a chronological methodology, I would like to honor Google's new Blog Search capability. I am proud of Google, not incidentially the owner of blogger, where this blog is located. Only 2 months after Yahoo had blog searching capability, and about a year after it bought the company with the best blogsearch technology, it released it. In Beta, of course.
So, without delay, enjoy the wild world of (updated) wacky websearches that led people (poor, poor unsuspecting people) to my blog.

I'll separate searches by search engine, for ease of entry. And remember, these search rankings were true at the point that I entered the data in my spreadsheet. Feel free to play along at home, with the search engine of your choice.

For the term "carrottop", on AltaVista, I was ranked 4th. Yahoo had "carrottop in shape" at 4th too. How weird is THAT?

Yahoo had "dairy of a mad black woman"at 11th. Ask.com had the phrase "who starred in A Dairy of a Mad Black Woman"; and on the 22nd of August I was Number *1*. VICTORY!

I had two visitors from MSN Search. With the search "dragoncon 2005 photos", I was on page 13. "dragoncon 2005 pictures" on Yahoo came in a disappointingly low 82nd. The interestingly conjoined phrase "chick-filet dodgeball" gave me yet another number *1* - of the only three results total.

Technorati is the grandfather of blog searches. As such, the phrase "dailydancer" put me in the Top 6. "jojo green day concert" gave me yet *another* NUMBER 1 on 26-Aug.

As I mentioned last time, Yahoo is the real winner here in bringing peeps to my site. all below. are all phrases from that websearch.
Revisting some from the first edition of Sean's Weird Websearches: "John mcdonald the last one left" came in at sixth. However, the book still blows. Thanks, EverBabe, for "dog and porcupine" which came in 15th. Still that was better than "pictures of spider bites to the finger", a drooping 22nd. "dogthebountyhunter" was 77th when I checked on the search, but may have originally been in the top 40.

I show up at 3rd and 8th for the phrase "The 3 Variable Funny Test", only below the actual creators of the three variable test. How weird.
Yikes! My *link* to the Brian Ellis website, the originator of my quote "saying keep it real", is MUCH higher than even the original Brian Ellis website with this phrase.

"t-man transcript" Poor T-man - more popular than he liked, I imagine. But his real transcript would get an even higher ranking than the number *1* I recieved. The rank for the search for "Jennifer Nettles"was 93rd. I need to do a retrospective, maybe move back up on the list here.

I think the space in "cartman isms" must have contributed to my success to my NUMBER 1 PLACEMENT. "touched by his noodly appendage" Guys at the Skeptic's panel at DragonCon LOVED this site. But to be ranked number *1* for that search? For THIS blog? That's unlikely.

My site was 37th for the search "sean crisp". I am threatened by the existance of this fellow, and hope he's not a giant potato chip. Vampire. ...ermm.... Chipire. Never mind.

"WWW.BOOBOO.COM" came in at 50th. I just don't even begin to understand why my site is ranked number 50, instead of the original WEBSITE www.booboo.com.

Lastly, I am not sure which makes me more uncomfortable: the fact that SOMEBODY did a search for so-called "Freaky pictures", or that my site was in the 60-70 range.

NOT talking about SuperMark

EverBabe - I'm not saying this made me think of you. But I'm not saying it didn't.

Dear Prudence,

I'm sure, like most women, I sometimes feel I need to parent my husband. He is an intelligent man who started from an entry-level position in college to management, where he will celebrate 20 years this winter. He is an excellent husband and father. He worked two jobs to help put me through school. There are moments, though, when I feel our 4-year-old has better comprehension skills. Some things are little, like not rinsing dirty dishes or letting the garbage overflow; those I can overlook. Some things are more important. He has ruined many pieces of clothing (usually mine) by attempting to do laundry without sorting the colors, then gets upset when I bring it to his attention. His defense is that he is only trying to help. But this morning he fished his old toothbrush out of the garbage rather than ask me which new one was his. He said he didn't want to wake me. Prudie, I buy the same color every time! I do not understand how this seemingly intelligent executive can sometimes be an idiot savant. He is begging me to have a second child. After this latest incident, I am genuinely concerned. I do not want to be a single mother of three.

?Kissing a Garbage Mouth

Dear Kiss,

Would you be offended if Prudie said she smiled while reading your letter? Some men are just not on the domestic wavelength. Yours does seem very considerate of you otherwise. The missteps sound as though he is just not thinking about common-sense things, or perhaps he's a space shot if it's something he's not fully engaged with. Here's a mechanistic solution so you won't have to be annoyed anymore. By all means tell him he is relieved of laundry duty. Buy toothbrushes that have different configurations. (Maybe he's colorblind?) Because he wants to pitch in, "assign" him chores and then spell out how you'd like them done. And don't let the toothbrush episode stand in the way of a second child. Good luck managing your loving idiot savant. Prudie knows you can do it.

Thanks to Slate

KATRINA TIMELINE

This is a lint to a very interesting timeline that tends to.... *question* current talking points that the local and state governments didn't ask for help in time. I've pulled together some of the more applicable headlines. (PS - this timeline has links to each document, mostly from official websites such as whitehouse.gov - so while the website itself might have a political slant, the times and dates are likely correct)

Friday, August 26
GOV. KATHLEEN BLANCO DECLARES STATE OF EMERGENCY IN LOUISIANA

Saturday, August 27
GOV. HALEY BARBOUR DECLARES STATE OF EMERGENCY IN MISSISSIPPI [Office of the Governor]

GOV. BLANCO ASKS BUSH TO DECLARE FEDERAL STATE OF EMERGENCY IN LOUISIANA:

FEDERAL EMERGENCY DECLARED, DHS AND FEMA GIVEN FULL AUTHORITY TO RESPOND TO KATRINA:

Sunday, August 28

9:30 AM — MAYOR NAGIN ISSUES FIRST EVER MANDATORY EVACUATION OF NEW ORLEANS:

AFTERNOON — BUSH, BROWN, CHERTOFF WARNED OF LEVEE FAILURE BY NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTER DIRECTOR:

Monday, August 29

7AM – KATRINA MAKES LANDFALL AS A CATEGORY 4 HURRICANE

10:30AM — MICHAEL BROWN FINALLY REQUESTS THAT DHS DISPATCH 1,000 EMPLOYEES TO REGION, GIVES THEM TWO DAYS TO ARRIVE:

U.S. unprepared to receive foreign aid - Americas - International Herald Tribune

"Even with difficulties delivering foreign aid, it is beginning to arrive at or near the Gulf Coast, including ready-to-eat meals from Britain, tents from France, and first-aid kits and baby formula from Italy"

For all of those who say: where is the aid from all of those other countries that we've helped in the past?

Blog showing the fact that we've been offered a *lot* of aid. (yes, even from France)

"The oil-rich nation of Qatar has offered the United States $100 million to assist in the humanitarian crisis triggered by Hurricane Katrina."

They can afford it, you say? How about the POOR nations, recently squashed by the tsunami?
"...official statements of sympathy and aid offers from at least 70 nations, including countries usually on the receiving end of U.S. and other foreign help. Among them was Bangladesh, which Monday pledged $1 million."

So, as a country, I think that it's clear that we have plenty to feel sorry for ourselves for; being abandoned by the rest of the world just doesn't fit the facts.

God Outdoes Terrorists Yet Again | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Sadly, once again some of the best coverage of disasters comes from our satirical and humor newsmagazines.

DragonCon 2005 - It's a Shindig!

Alrighty, I'll write a little about my fun times at the first night of DragonCon. It was where I dressed up as much as possible, and then boogied my pants off. Although they stayed on.

But, that is neither here nor there. Here are some random pictures of the ladies I danced with (probably at least 3 hours of dancing. yay, me.) But MAN I was sore; the entire rest of the (very) long weekend I was seen to moan and groan of my body's aches and pains, although no one seemed to care. Hmm... that might have had SOMETHING to do with what happened later that night. (more later on that - as if you pervs care. ) To the ladies!





















Here's an action shot of Jewel Staithe, in her prime beatbox mode.



Note Wacky Mr Jewel dancing like a loon as Jewel chitterchats with some lucky nobody. (...stoopid nobody)

This one's just weird. I like bad drag as much as the next guy (who doesn't!) Here she dancing with ... them?

Alrighty, the girl in red latex miniskirt. That was pleasant. She was dating/married to the guy on the left beside her, who was in an... *interesting* movie. Will tell you more about that later.

















Here we have a nice picture of Adam Baldwin. Who's he, you ask? Well, he's obviously in Serenity (the FireFly movie) BUT -> noticed him in Full Metal Jacket too. And he's 10 years OLDER than me. Weird.

Note RedLatex next to Adam. Is that close enough to a 'star' for you? {grin} Could have hit him in the head, if I didn't want to get pummeled. or more realistically, even if I *did* want that. Which I didn't. No, sir.

OK, stupidest story of the weekend. The Shindig got out about 3:30, which meant I got to the hotel about 4 AM. I *did* have a key to the hotel room, but it had been latched from the inside. So: possible bed was inside, as well as the keys to my car and house (so taxi wouldn't have helped.) Truthfully, I wasn't even positive there was room for me on the *floor*. I didn't want to beat on the door willy nilly and wake up a potential 17 peeps, and decided I'd just wait in the lobby til someone was moving around. Now, we were staying in the T- , not part of the main complex. Upon reflection, coulda/woulda/shoulda stayed in the two main hotels, and tried to sleep on a couch. Less homeless people wandering through the lobby. {YIKES}Seriously, it makes it harder to sleep if you're scared your booty will get jacked as you rest. So, I slept in a chair from 5 AM - 8 AM, in three one-hour increments. Then BigD (staying in the same hotel, and wandering out to charge his cell phone) told me to beat on the door. Which I did. And then they opened the door, and showed me to my fold-a-bed. Which was empty. {shakes head} But I did end up with this nice picture of me sleeping. (What? Sometimes I sleepphoto! (like sleepwalking, but *much* more unlikely.) )



More to come later!

Sean's StarStruck DragonCon '05

Alrighty, I'm home, and (mostly) alive. (although bedtime will be very, *very* soon, I wanted to post the best picture taken *with* my camera, albeit one of the few that *I* didn't take. I just wanted to show you guys the fact that my camera was *THIS CLOSE* to Jewel Staithe, actress in such shows as Firefly, Dead Like Me, and Wonderfalls. More details later on how the picture came to be, but the highpoints were: MixMaster Jewel, me really hurting after a night of dancing, and Mr Jewel posing. Like a poser. Stupid Mr Jewel. {grin} I'll probably either do one big post for the Con, or show some sort of highlight reel. I did take several accidental movies.

Hmm - just noticed it looks like she is nekkid. That is, however, not the case. As you'll see in the OTHER pictures. When I get them posted. Which will not be tonight. Sorry.

The Rebellion of the Talking Heads - Newscasters, sick of official lies and stonewalling, finally start snarling.

EverBabe - this story is EXACTLY what we were talking about today. The reporters, who like to at least have the appearance of impartiality, are so frustrated with the loss of life and back slapping by the officials that they are actually calling the politicians on their sh!t. Which is when journalists SHOULD be respected.

I'm curious about whether this will be the watershed event that will give journalists back their good name.

Summary of Findings: Religion A Strength And Weakness For Both Parties

CRAP CRAP CRAP

Or, as Slate says, "Sixty-four percent of Americans want schools to teach creationism along with evolution. Forty-two percent think "living things have existed in their present form since the beginning of time," and another 18 percent believe in evolution but think a supreme being guides it."

Or, as SuperMark says: "42% of Americans think evolution is a total crock? That's amazing."

Ah well - maybe we'll have bred that out in 100 years.

2005 Dragon Con - Or, How Sean Spent His Weekend As A Big Ol' Dork

So, DragonCon, the annual nerd-a-thon here in Atlanta, starts today. I had always wanted to go, and this year seemed like a good time. (no previous committments, etc.) Registration was last night, and I bumped into two groups of variously leveled geek friends.

(it looks as though i very carefully took a movie of them and Chewbacca, instead of a still - I will try to get a screen capture, though)

Enjoy the sight of a blurry Chewbacca and apparently the back of some short Imperial trooper.

PS - if you haven't heard from me by Tuesday, call the police.